Please I need answers

Before I start please take this seriously and response honest no jokes please.
I am a 16 year old boy and I’m from Belgium so I’m sorry if I spell things wrong. Since last year I began to be kinda obsessed with blood and I like watching people get hurt. And I thought that it was just me because I have ASS but recently I cut my self for fun I wondered how it would feel I’m not depressed or anything. And when it was bleeding I sucked it up and a few days later I found glass and I couldn’t help my self so I dit it again it was in school so I went to the toilets and I licked and sucked and every time I did it I was getting to like it at first it was just so my clothes wouldn’t be in blood but then it was just nice and the blood was so pure I put som on my fingers and it was so beautiful. And did some research and I came across multiple sites and I really renkenised my self. and I think I’m a vampire I’m afraid and freaking out so please if you know any vampires that could help me or tell me how to feed on emotion or something please I don’t know anything about this except from vampire series like vampire dairy’s but that’s fake I know that but PLEASE HELP our give me a number if I vampire

Seek professional help and greater balance. 
I'm doing my best to be kind but it's obvious that you need a great amount of help. 
Help that no one here can give you.

Don't harm yourself or others.

Enjoying to watch people get hurt is not a vampire trait. Pursuing help about this in most vampire groups that you can find online will only cause further damage and put at great risk of abuse.

I second the opinion above and please seek medical help. After you get evaluated by a professional and begin to recover we will be more than willing to teach you more about real vampirism if that is still your interest.

Seems like you've got some shadow work integration to do. Look up Carl Jung's description on that. It's because you say you like watching others get hurt so you've clearly got to integrate parts of your shadow least it come out in unwanted expressions that might be harmful. Just my opinion and recommended advice together with what Rhea Kaye and Jonathan said above.

MysticLightShinethForth wrote:Seems like you've got some shadow work integration to do. Look up Carl Jung's description on that. It's because you say you like watching others get hurt so you've clearly got to integrate parts of your shadow least it come out in unwanted expressions that might be harmful. Just my opinion and recommended advice together with what Rhea Kaye and Jonathan said above.

oké thanks

Please bear Jonathan's remark in mind as well, it is rather serious, because if you go to vampire groups there can be more shady people there than you might think. Risks of abuse are indeed a reality because not all people in those communities are at all of any reputable worth and some lurk around for the absolutely wrong reasons. Besides the fact that not many of them appear to be real vampires anyways... lol.