Resonance and Reflections

I am not claiming to be a Concubine, merely stating that - based on the information that I have devoured eagerly and with my self-reflection thus far - their path, their way, this Lineage - resonates with me on many levels.

The strength of their tie to kheperu and adaptation of the entire Self to their surrounding community is something that I have experienced quite deeply. Perhaps not helped by close to a decade of bullying throughout my youth, but persistent afterwards. A desire to adapt to the setting, a chameleon-esque skill be it visually or

I am becoming stronger in my sense of Self; I recently shaved all of my hair off. Not just to donate it, which was a purpose behind it, but also to shed my skin of how I was clinging to the 'how I should look' statements and perceptions and not 'how I want to look'. It was a particularly powerful moment for me, and didn't really sink in until I was holding the plait of hair in my hand. So much of my previous look - and to an extent, Self - was tied into my long hair, but that was due to fear of other's perceptions and trying to fit in.

I was always reserved, in the VC, about admitting that I donate both energy and blood to my spouse. I had been given the impression right from the start that it was 'wrong', and that no vampy(i)re should or even could be both. I went through quite the crippling period where I didn't feed out of the belief that perhaps I was just a delusional Black Swan, but that damaged me rather significantly and, thankfully, that period of particularly ruthless self-investigation ended and, after feeding, I was far more settled. It is possible for a vampyre to donate  to another, and there is no flaw associated with this act, given how deeply intimate and trusting it is. For me, it is also exceptionally beneficial.

I am still working on trying to find my core sense of Self; trying to discern between what is 'expected' and what is 'me', and how much of the facets of my identity are truly what I desire and what is best suited to me, and how much is done for the sake of keeping up appearances and going with the majority current.

This is something that has been observed by others; the subtle adaptations, the changes both external and in perception, to the point of being regarded as uncommon in comparison to  the subtle distinctions that others make. Something that I am learning not to do; I am as I am, and should not need to change, at least so drastically or often.

I still have yet to read the Violet Thrones, so I am aware that my knowledge and awareness can and will be deepened further still, but this is a start. I plan on adding to this thread as further reflections and considerations come to mind.

That was an interesting and personal take, so thank you for sharing those experiences with us. I don't think people should be judgemental in such open analysis, even when one considers the possibility of the path put forth by certain Lineage, especially since you aren't claiming anything definitive but just exploring. I find that such explorations are part of the process of growth within Asetianism and nearly everyone goes through it at some point. It's only natural to question and wonder. There are valuable lessons there as well.

What you mention about the intimate metaphysical exchanges that are possible within vampirism is also interesting, because as you experienced the VC (especially its more superficial layers) is often unaware of how vampires can also be potent donors of energy. In fact I believe the Aset Ka and their culture are one of the very few to reference this and openly include it as valuable practice. They go as far as having advanced metaphysical techniques for that very purpose, the intimate exchange of energy in a communion between vampires that is highly beneficial to both. As you've already discovered, Scarabs (Concubines) are particularly adept at this cycling of energy as so are Scorpions (Guardians) but in a way more focused on the mysteries of sacred sexuality.

Hello nachtzehren, thanks for sharing your thoughts with us.
I agree with Jonathan in that people should not be judgmental over this. There's definitely nothing wrong with exploring, and the way you presented your thoughts was respectful too. Many Asetianists explore possibilities.

Thank you for the replies both.

Jonathan:
R.e the VC; Yes, exactly. Ordinarily when the subject of donors comes up, it is presented in a way referring to Black Swans exclusively rather than vampires who are also voluntarily donors, and who are capable of doing so without harming themselves or the individual that are donating to in the process. Even before I engaged with the VC, I saw no reason why an individual could not do both if they had the resources and desire to do so.

Rhea Kaye
Possibilities are wonderful. I do recall reading the section of the AB on Concubines and getting one of those shiver-down-the-spine moments, but I think that an identification with is just as important and to be cherished and an identification as.

*and to be cherished as an identification as.

It is interesting to hear your story about shaving off your hair. (By the way, it's a nice look on you.) I am glad the experience gave you some feeling of inner power. Moments in which one sheds those chains raised by how others perceive you are potent for evolution.

I must say, the Scarab Lineage is deeply beautiful. Their "shortcomings", when viewed through the right lens, only add to the exquisite beauty of who and how they are. Their capabilities, the way they bond to their loved ones, and the ease with which they share devotion and energy surely are cherished, forming a vital part of the Pyramid.

There's definitely nothing wrong with appreciating their Lineage, finding a resonance and being interested in exploring them more, when approached with a respectful desire to learn and be open to possibilities. It's also good to see more people being interested and attracted to the Scarabs, since they seem to be talked about less often than the other two. Indeed, no matter what the nature of one's soul is, an Asetianist can benefit a lot from learning more about that archetype and being open to the nature of its magic.

I'd like to add that the common notions of "oh a vampire must not donate blood or energy, otherwise they're inferior/not vampiric" is very flawed and also shows quite an egocentric mindset. There is magic in submission and surrender, which can only truly be used metaphysically by the brave and courageous. When used responsibly, it surely opens doorways to alchemy and heightening of the magic of both persons involved.

Double post alert (sorry in advance): This also makes me wish we had an Asetianist or two who would be open to speaking about resonances or attractions to the Keepers, or Anubians.

Also less talked about, but an exquisite, vital piece of that ancient Family... devoted in ways not many can comprehend. I can feel only awe and intense respect for the Anubians.

Rhea Kaye wrote:It is interesting to hear your story about shaving off your hair. (By the way, it's a nice look on you.) I am glad the experience gave you some feeling of inner power. Moments in which one sheds those chains raised by how others perceive you are potent for evolution.

Thank you. It was certainly a very emotive moment. It was helped in that way by the person shaving my head being my Beloved (who is also a vampire). For quite some time while I was considering doing, I had feared they would no longer be attracted to me. I have been proven quite wrong, and my head-weasels/irrational worries were wrong to think that they were so shallow. Which I know that they aren't, but, nasty little biting head-demons can be tricksy beasts at times. They found the experience to be exceptionally moving as well.

I must say, the Scarab Lineage is deeply beautiful. Their "shortcomings", when viewed through the right lens, only add to the exquisite beauty of who and how they are. Their capabilities, the way they bond to their loved ones, and the ease with which they share devotion and energy surely are cherished, forming a vital part of the Pyramid.

I whole-heartedly agree. I'd been drawn to the symbology before I Awakened, so there is perhaps a subtle thread of amusement in that I seem to have come full circle in returning to finding kheperu and the Scarab to be a draw. I can easily see why some might see some of the Scarab's shortcomings to be a flaw, but, I also see the fluidity as a necessary adaptation; an openness to societal changes around it, allowing the vampire to move parallel to society even if still - by default of being inhuman - apart from it at the same time.

There's definitely nothing wrong with appreciating their Lineage, finding a resonance and being interested in exploring them more, when approached with a respectful desire to learn and be open to possibilities. It's also good to see more people being interested and attracted to the Scarabs, since they seem to be talked about less often than the other two. Indeed, no matter what the nature of one's soul is, an Asetianist can benefit a lot from learning more about that archetype and being open to the nature of its magic.

Definitely agreed. As I have seen mentioned before in this particular part of the forums, people tend not to discuss or want to align with the Scarabs because they aren't 'cool', or quite fit the stereotype that people associate with the word vampire.

I'd like to add that the common notions of "oh a vampire must not donate blood or energy, otherwise they're inferior/not vampiric" is very flawed and also shows quite an egocentric mindset. There is magic in submission and surrender, which can only truly be used metaphysically by the brave and courageous. When used responsibly, it surely opens doorways to alchemy and heightening of the magic of both persons involved.

Yes, this is something I realised. I am also quite submissive by default in general, and always found the assumed correlation between vampire and dominant to be quite exhausting.

I'd like to keep adding to this interesting discussion, sharing my interpretations.

One thing I find quite beautiful about this Lineage is their pain tolerance and the implications that could hold in relationships. The way they crave pain, and can use vital energy to transform that into pleasure. Over the years studying Asetianism, I noticed the Scarab lineage just isn't regarded with as much popularity, desire, or even respect as a whole. As another (experienced) person stated once, many crave for power and that is why they skip this one over, exposing limitations in the process. Scarabs are said to be the most numerous as well, so it seems implied that there aren't as many Scorpions or, of course, Serpents within the Asetian Family. Just a small detail and one not meant to attack anyone else, as mindful exploration is encouraged here no matter what the area of resonance is and each is on their own path.

Pain when combined in a sexual or otherwise emotionally intimate context is beautiful in a truly intense and breathtaking way. That whole sense of submitting completely to a Master, even worshipping one's partner and bowing to them completely, is truly moving and inspiring... a piece of immortally breathing art allowing for deeper energy links and divine love. I would not think such a dynamic of worship is limited to only Scorpions. (Though I'm curious to see other opinions on this facet.)

I think that within the flame of pain and absolute submission, a Scarab could find themselves in a transcendent state that touches the ethereal and brings them closer to that pure nothingness of Chaos which they embody so well. Truly an ancient magic.

The Book of Giza is wonderful for contemplating each Lineage, I must say. A valuable tool that can spark meditative visions, intense feelings, liberation, hope and renewal within the Asetianist. Ancient calls from the purity of the Duat, resonating in the spark of each banner of power.

Rhea Kaye wrote:I'd like to keep adding to this interesting discussion, sharing my interpretations.

Please do! I intend to as well.

Pain when combined in a sexual or otherwise emotionally intimate context is beautiful in a truly intense and breathtaking way. That whole sense of submitting completely to a Master, even worshipping one's partner and bowing to them completely, is truly moving and inspiring... a piece of immortally breathing art allowing for deeper energy links and divine love. I would not think such a dynamic of worship is limited to only Scorpions. (Though I'm curious to see other opinions on this facet.)

As a submissive masochist, yes, I definitely get exactly what you mean here.

I think that within the flame of pain and absolute submission, a Scarab could find themselves in a transcendent state that touches the ethereal and brings them closer to that pure nothingness of Chaos which they embody so well. Truly an ancient magic.

Definitely. Pain and submission is like a gateway to a more primordial, raw and unfettered state. I've often used the word 'primal' in association with... not so much how I do kink, but how I feel and perceive it.

The Book of Giza is wonderful for contemplating each Lineage, I must say. A valuable tool that can spark meditative visions, intense feelings, liberation, hope and renewal within the Asetianist. Ancient calls from the purity of the Duat, resonating in the spark of each banner of power.

I'll make a note to add that book to the reading list.

nachtzehren, I know you probably read this many times before, but you could definitely benefit a lot in your path from venturing into the mysteries and dangers of the Violet Throne. It's a much more advanced book, a collection of books and grimoires in fact. From the maturity you express and clarity in your discourse I believe you're ready for it...

Nightshade wrote:nachtzehren, I know you probably read this many times before, but you could definitely benefit a lot in your path from venturing into the mysteries and dangers of the Violet Throne. It's a much more advanced book, a collection of books and grimoires in fact. From the maturity you express and clarity in your discourse I believe you're ready for it...

It's on my 'to get' list. Unfortunately up to this point, financial constraints have put a delay on obtaining it. But, it is a planned purchase

Em Hotep.
Beautiful topic and discussion. It is a pleasure reading such a polite and interesting exchange of ideas.
This exploration is quite wonderful, as it allows us to be open to possibilities, do discard the ones that do not fit, to experience and question.
It is indeed a beautiful Lineage and it holds unique traits, as the others.
Like some often can read, unfortunately in old posts it is a Lineage that people tend to not feel very attracted to.

Like Rhea mentioned there is a lot about it, related to the bond, love, dedication. The pain converted into pleasure and how the energy can come from that.

What I find most beautiful is exactly this approach, with respect, with questions and doubts. Not claims, not crazy thoughts like some may have.

But even those thoughts, delusional ones, many times, come to teach a lesson... ( I can say I learn a lot with mine, hehehe)

Thank you all for your words, it is nice to learn with all of you.

I agree, very nice discussion especially with the politeness and respectful support. It can set an example and maybe even pave the way toward more topics. Also, I too must recommend the Violet Throne. A wonderful tome... One with potent magic that has stuck to me in an unnervingly permanent and irreversible way.
Actually, I'm glad she opened this thread because it struck a chord with me. I can raise a candle in solidarity over the resonance with Scarabs (with the necessary mindful respect of course, keeping the mind open and under the guidance of humility).
The Scarab Lineage vibrates with an incredible familiarity for me. Their ways are just beautiful. The way they can radiate that warmth for their family, sharing love and devotion outside of the realm of mortal comprehension. The way their internal chaos makes them often have to fight harder to find and conquer themselves, heightening the value of the experience when self is finally strengthened. The entire concept of selfless devotion to the Aset Ka, finding strength in remaining "within the zero" so to speak, bonding to the mighty Serpents and serving them with their inner flame. I also like that they can be rather diverse, some of them being antisocial.
I must say that the experience of reading the updated Lineage section on the Scarabs was rather intense, sparking an overwhelming flow of emotions inside of me. Emotions I could barely handle, tears and more than a little discomfort as many things struck me in ways impossible to ignore. What that means I cannot say definitively or with claims of arrogance, but at any rate, it is an interesting possibility for a learning experience regardless of the meaning.
I feel greatly at home in that whole sense of selfless devotion, completely intense obsession and submission to the right one, and even plenty of the grievous aspects as well.
Of course, I mean no disrespect or claim in stating any of this, just sharing some thoughts about my own feelings for them and my experiences so far with exploring what calls me.
Good topic.

I say I would also suggest the Violet Throne.

Interesting and beautiful thread indeed. I believe a lot comes out of it, positively, by the deeper reflection upon this Lineage.

Personally I might relate to the archetype of Scarabs in the way of somewhat, seemingly, natural cycling in adapatation to different social situations and, chameleon-like, blending in seemingly unnoticed, although this is not always the case as it can bring other similarities from different Lineages, just speaking archetypically for lack of other frames of reference and more pertinent to this discussion; I don't think I am an Asetian at all but, as many have said here, you can relate and draw resonance to their different archetypes within different Lineages anyways and still, as a subject of psychological, spiritual and subtle exploration.

I believe I can also relate to it in terms of submission, although not really in a masochistic sense. In fact, I have grown bored and tired of mostly all forms of sex - if not, bluntly speaking, all... There is not much appeal in it anymore. I am an old man, although I am not. But the sense in which I can relate to it then, is in my approach socially, but it is very intricate and difficult to explicate.

Personally I might relate to the archetype of Scarabs in the way of somewhat, seemingly, natural cycling in adapatation to different social situations and, chameleon-like, blending in seemingly unnoticed, although this is not always the case as it can bring other similarities from different Lineages...

I have noticed similar. I did previously align more with the Guardian path, due to the soulmate trait in particular, but it was then upon further introspection that I realised that - as someone who has been genuinely polyamorous in the past (even if I later did realise that it was not suited to me) - it did not feel right to associate with that lineage because of past actions. I couldn't have aligned with that path or felt it as a calling because had I been truly aligned, I would not have felt anything for others until I had met my now-spouse.

I believe I can also relate to it in terms of submission, although not really in a masochistic sense. In fact, I have grown bored and tired of mostly all forms of sex - if not, bluntly speaking, all... There is not much appeal in it anymore. I am an old man, although I am not. But the sense in which I can relate to it then, is in my approach socially, but it is very intricate and difficult to explicate.

I am asexual, so the correlation between pain and pleasure is an interesting one. Pain - and submission - does not make me aroused, but it does fill me with a sense of inner peace, and I genuinely feel fulfilled when I hand over complete power to my Beloved. I tend to self-describe as sex-indifferent, but my spouse is also asexual so we pleasantly align in that regard.

I enjoyed reading the original post, Nacht.

Generally speaking, yes, it's considered not a good idea for a vampire to be a donor to another vampire, but it's not impossible and some can make it work (as seems to be your case). There are references in a number of organized groups to exchanges between vampires. References that likely all stem from the Aset Ka - House Kheperu, House-Eclipse, and generally any other House, group or organized path that utilizes a Caste system will have documents, write ups or at least references to each Caste playing a role and engaging in ritualistic exchanges with their own.

I try to be honest, and logical. To me, if two vampires need the same thing, feeding off each other shouldn't work. If it works, perhaps the need is different, or perhaps a vampire's need just isn't logical *shrugs* I hope it wasn't ever my advice or views that sent you through that troubled period.

It's common to go through periods of doubt, it seems to be a sad but common event where each individual, each vampire (maybe not every), starves their self for one reason or another. For me it was doubt of being a vampire at all.

I will have to catch up on the rest of hte responses another time. I just wanted to comment on the bit that stuck with me the most from teh OP.

A.Nightside, do you think there is a possibility of having some kind of vampiric nature and not know of it, neither explicitly experiencing any hunger or thirst for energy but merely indications of it, and then starving themselves unknowingly in that way? Just my personal questions.

@Mystic
Yes,
Sort of,
Yes.

Mind you, my foundation, or at least my beginnings on the subject of Vampires and Vampirism stem from the branches of the dreaded Vampire Community (though I still count forums like this as part of said "community", even if individuals do not directly affiliate). I believe latent vampirism is possible. I believe one can be oblivious to their nature, their need. Though, I don't believe there is an absence of Hunger, but rather it goes unrecognized and indications/symptoms grow until one comes to the realization of their self (aka "awaken"). I do believe starvation spurs this self-recognition, but isn't always enough. I also believe the the subtle/spirit body naturally takes in energy to stave off starvation, but can not maintain optimum functioning on auto-feeds alone. Starvation of the subtle body may result or influence in physical, and chronic, conditions.

Can one be turned? I.E genuinely not have Hunger or be Vampiric, and then somehow become or gain it? I have no solidified personal judgement on the matter. I've heard hypotheses and personal theories that sound plausible to me, but nothing I've been able to verify personally. I am skeptical, but also doubt a little on the matter of turning.

Much of what I speak of my information basis may be from the VC, but my descriptions, or what I hold to be truth, are personal truths. Things such as auto-feeds, starvation and the variety of awekening that I describe, are personal experiences and not just, if at all, information gleaned off of others.

A.Nightside wrote:I try to be honest, and logical. To me, if two vampires need the same thing, feeding off each other shouldn't work. If it works, perhaps the need is different, or perhaps a vampire's need just isn't logical *shrugs*

I have always regarded blood as being self-replacing, thanks to the biological process of haematopoiesis. What is in the blood that is fed off parallels this mechanism. Therefore, someone cannot 'run out' unless you literally stop the mechanism, which... would be killing them, as all of their blood would be drained. Which is, to use a phrase, 'not kosher'. So long as at least one of us is healthy and well-fed [can be through food, water, energy etc], there is no reason why my spouse can't feed off me and I off them, even if not necessarily at the same time to allow for everything to balance out and top up again.

Sorry for the delayed response.

Wouldn't a blood feeding vampire then not need to feed, if the "stuff" within blood is also self-replenishing?

It's ok. I appreciate the response

A.Nightside wrote:Wouldn't a blood feeding vampire then not need to feed, if the "stuff" within blood is also self-replenishing?

It's ok. I appreciate the response

I badly phrased my previous answer - or at the very least, I was not specific enough. One of us does get energy from elsewhere other than just blood, therefore what is in the blood does not remain depleted. Blood is what we share, and we are each other's only donors for that particular method of feeding. Does that make sense? Trying to make sure I have articulated it thoroughly.

As much as I will use the term 'sanguivore' as blood is what I primarily feed from and get significant benefits from, energy work is something that I have engaged in previously on a fledgling level. For the better part of my life, I guess I could have been classified as a 'psi', using VC terminology*, before I had access to someone who was willing to let me drink their blood.

Previously, that access was not possible; my living circumstances and personal situation were not compatible with access to a donor. One source is considerably better than the other for me.

* From what I can gather and from what my reading has detailed, A.K does not distinguish between 'types' of vampire in the sense of how they primarily or exclusively feed.

Slowly beginning to get to a point where I can begin exploring more in earnest again. Work entanglements remain persistently strong but I am getting to the point of managing them better.

As both books are near to the same price, would folks recommend either the Violet Throne or the Book of Orion for the next reading after the Asetian Bible? Both at the same time is, unfortunately, not presently an option.